Well it's over for another year and I've survived again albeit with bowel movements swaying dramatically from pebble-dashing to prehistoric rock formations!
I managed to get away with only 2 Christmas parties this year and both were a cracking good time. Cracking being the operative word as I managed to recreate the ending of Torville & Dean's Bolero on an icy Broad Street in my new pointy, party shoes........TWICE! Well the queue outside Walkabout demanded an encore so I had to oblige, didn't I.
Christmas shopping was stress-free this year. Did it all online in November. How bloody cool am I eh? Well I was really cool until my father rang me last Friday to inform me that he'd forgotten to tell me that the hamper I ordered for him had been sent back to Harrods due to the fact that he'd forgotten it was being delivered and had gone out for the day with his new lady 'friend'. Don't get me started on that bombshell!! I mean he's 80 with arthritis and prostrate trouble FFS!
Anyway said Lothario forgot to tell me that this happened a week or so before, so I'm left making frantic calls to Harrods at 5.27pm on the Friday before Christmas to try and find out where the bloody hamper is. The local Post Office don't have it and it's not found it's way back to Harrods either so it's probably landed up as a special Christmas gift to some lucky Mother in Dundee whose son works for Parcel Force.
Between me and a Harrods Customer Service Manager, who sounded like Zippy from Rainbow, we managed to agree on a hamper re-send and I told the old letch that he had to stay at home for a couple of days and wait for the delivery. I'm sure he could find something to keep him occupied on GalaBingoBabes.co.uk if he got desperate.
Christmas day was a rather bizarre experience. Me and my ex spending it with my ex's boyfriend and his ex. It wasn't as bad as I'd thought and in fact it was quite good fun. Well anything is fun after 3 half pints of mulled wine I guess. It was all going rather well and in fact I found the ex's boyfriend's ex to be extremely attractive and was enjoying the day more and more. However the thought of someone else I like right now made me hold back and not get too flirty. That and the fact that even thinking of the complications of me with ex's boyfriend's ex................ Oh jeez it just doesn't bear thinking about! That would be a 4 star Blog in the making or a dead cert for a reality TV shown on Living TV between Queer Eye and Extreme Makeover UK. Is it just me or are the UK women on there not really that different at the end? They all still look a bit Chav but with nice hair and a decent dress.
Whilst I'm on this rather gay topic. I was having a browse online and for some reason landed up on the Channel 4 News Form. Bloody hell Boxing Day is an anti-climax LOL
Found the usual gay debate on there. These threads are common on the News Forum and it amuses me how some people will post anti-gay statements in the guise of a 'debate'.
I also find it it hilarious that straight males claim to fear homosexuals like they are some sort of aggressive heavy mob waiting to pounce on fragile little straight men and force them into some gay sex act. What is it they fear I wonder?
It surely can't be the act of budgery as that is popular between consenting straight couples(mainly for male gratification). It is also common in all male schools/prisons and even used as a form of attack & dominance on other males.
It leads me to assume that this terrible fear must be due to the fact that, what they will quite happily do to a woman or indeed another man, might be done to them by some big gay brute of a man. OK maybe I can understand that the role reversal may not be appealing but I wonder where these men think these fearful attacks might take place?
Trapped behind the lockers in Holmes Place gym and tied up with some iPod Shuffle headphones?
Bashed over the head with a bag of Mange Tout and dragged into Tesco's toilets......more room in the wheelchair cubicle!
Heaven forbid they should sit next to a gay on a bus/train. That would be just asking for trouble! Look out for tell tale signs guys.....HEAT magazine and Diesel trainers....before you sit down.
OK I'm being flippant now but I really would like to know why someone would be scared of me and think that I'm on the prowl every day for a weak straight guy to dominate for sexual pleasure???? Hmmmm. I'm turning myself on now.
Most of my male friends are straight and I don't see them trembling with fear in my company. Backing off at the overpowering smell of my D&G cologne maybe.......but never scared of the contents of my pants.
I do combat sports as a hobby and work out with a lot of tough blokes who don't bat an eyelid about my sexuality. It's just not an issue for them.
Oh look I've gone off track again haven't I. Back to Christmas.
It wasn't so bad after all and in fact I received something nice on my new phone that made me smile during the present unwrapping. I did get lots of lovely pressies but then there were the usual presents that required Academy Award standard acting during the ceremony.
I mean what was I supposed to say at the sight of a remote controlled Dalek and a Croydon Advertiser mug............................
